Jackhammer Esophagus!

Who dares? JACKHAMMER ESOPHAGUS, that's who!

What happens when good men do nothing? Evil roosts! Well, not on JACKHAMMER ESOPHAGUS's watch!

When the situation calls for a hero? Only JACKHAMMER ESOPHAGUS can fit the bill!

When the going gets tough? JACKHAMMER ESOPHAGUS gets going, and sends the bad guys packing!

Who's the "Man of Unbreakable Cobalt"? JACKHAMMER ESOPHAGUS, that's who!

What can stare down a kodiak bear? Only the steely eyes of JACKHAMMER ESOPHAGUS!

Who the hell is JACKHAMMER ESOPHAGUS? It's a goddamn name that was in the subject line of junkmail I received last week, and there has to be a better use of this random word association technology than to confuse my spamfilter.

What is the title of a thinly conceived blog-post? JACKHAMMER ESOPHAGUS, and you'll find yourself on the receiving end of the toughest adventurer/explorer in the Lost Continent's patented "Flying Fist Fury" if you're in league with Professor Chen-Lu and the Masters of Crime!