A coat of paint

...is just what this bitch needed. Welcome to my abode -- come in and enjoy the babka.

As an aside, I just got done watching "The Amazing Race: All-Stars," and I'll be damned if there's a genre-show that's quite that entertaining week after week. Phil Keoghan, you're my current T.V. dad, and I just want to run up on the finish mat to make you proud of me. Will that do it? What do you need to hear from me, Phil? Answer me! TELL ME! These are REAL TEARS! Whatever I do is NEVER enough for you! Want me to dance on the edge of a volcano? Would that make you happy, FINALLY!

Oh god... oh god... what a breakthrough... guh... guh...

(By the way, that guy's name's Maury Chaykin. He's a really talented character actor, doing solid, if greasy, work for decades now.)