Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Fuck! I just drank a quart of liquid nitrogen!

Arrgghh! It's frozen my tongue! My tongue -- it's splintered into a thousand shards, slicing my esophageal tract like a million tiny razors! My teeth have shattered like so many cracked-corn kernels!

Arrgghh! There goes my epiglottis! Shattered! The liquid nitrogen is washing over my stomach, freezing the contents! Urk! My bile has been frozen into an icy knife, pressing through the brittle, frozen wall of my stomach! Aarrgghhh! Crackle!

Why did I drink that liquid nitrogen! What a lousy idea! You'd think I would've learned my lesson the last time!