Monday, February 20, 2006

Not in the WINTER, jackass!

It's 30 degrees out, and the entire city is freezing its balls off. No shit -- even the women are freezing them off. That's how fucking cold it is. So, why is it that TWICE this weekend I spy two douschenozzles wearing FLIP-FLOPS in the fucking dead of winter? What the fuck statement is that? Because it isn't convenience -- flip-flops on a man state clearly and loudly that he is too fucking lazy too be bothered to wear shoes or somehow block his abominable feet from public view... a public who has probably eaten in the last week-and-a-half and has no interest in seeing your grotty, black soles. And that's if the weather logically supports wearing such an execrable thing. (Apparently, people have no interest in protecting their body from broken glass and splashed dog-urine, anyway.)

But when it's cold enough to freeze water? That means the wearer has no interest in joining a society of rational laws and consideration of the social contract, that thin membrane that stretches over all of our actions and allows us to coexist peaceably in a city of eight million people. It screams that no amount of common sense can penetrate the rainbow-hued soap-bubble of their solipcism and cavernous self-interest -- not even tangible meteorological phenomena. It means, "Stay away from me -- I cannot be trusted to exercise even the most cursory good judgement in my own interest, so think about what that might mean for you should your needs and mine be at odds with one another."

How about coming over to our side for the Big Win, sociopaths of the world? We could use your help pulling on the Same Rope under the Big Tent.

More importantly, get your stank feet out my fucking brain, selfish see-esser.