Mailbag

Dear Killingstuff Industry,

NO! NO-NO-NO-NO! BAD! NO-NO! WRONG!

I don't want an NRA membership, and I don't want to test "hunting products," I don't want to kill, shoot, or killshoot anything. ANYTHING! I don't want to be around firearms, and I certainly don't want to point them at anything (contrary to what this space seems to indicate six days out of seven). I don't want to stab, gut, skin, flay, carve, slice, garotte, keel-haul, murderize, burninate, or terminate anything with extreme prejudice. (For the record, I enjoy my prejudice "moderate.")

How do you guys even have my address and name anyway? Did you get my info via my subscription to "Soldier of Fortune" magazine?