Double Feature: The 24-hours-later review/Personal embarrassment

Joe's Pub hosted January's "Heeb Storytelling" thingie on Thursday night, as presented by Heeb magazine, natch. They gots a lot of talent up on that stage: the razorly-funny Susie Essman; the laconic, ironic Michael Showalter; some other Jewish people; and my domestic part-wife-ner. She wrote her own recaplet of the night's proceedings, but suffice it to say, it was a fucking awesome time. Janice ginned up this great distillation of Christmas eve at the girls' homeless shelter she volunteers at, and where everyone else had pretty much resorted to stand-up, she delivered poignancy. Yes, in fact, poignancy. On hand to watch were the Bruceandmickeys and the Dukeandleslies, two wonderful couples we're lucky to call friends.

But I acted against my most primal instinct after the show. I'll explain - I looked for Susie Essman (big fan, for years) to tell her how much I admire her work. Found her, told her - even unearthed a piece of her standup from the early-’90s to show her I'm not some fawning douschebag. I'm a well-referenced fawning douschebag. She arched her eyebrow in recognition of the sweet, sweet science I dropped, but then I fucked up and did the undidable - I asked her to call me a "fat fuck," a la Susie Greene.

Why? Why did I go there? It's SO insulting to ask an artist quip their trademarks on demand... for a herring, like a fucking seal. She entertained it, because she's a sport. Sorry, Suz.

I played it so cool on Mercer Street with Peter Dinklage last week, I swear.